What Marriage Means

A few years ago the governor of a state vetoed a bill limiting a marriage to a contract between a man and a woman. He said it was mean-spirited. The supreme court of another state decided that a married woman who had an affair with another woman had not committed adultery. These are only two situations within the past decade that illustrates how our society/culture is struggling with what marriage means.

When Jesus was asked about controversies which swirled around marriage in His day, He answered with basic truths about the nature of the relationship. These principles need to be fixed in our minds as we grapple with questions about marriage today.

The first is that the concept of marriage is rooted in the creation of God. The “therefore shall a man leave his father and mother” which begins the key Bible statement on marriage grows out of the fact that “He who created them from the beginning made them male and female” (Matthew 19:4,5) The relationship is possible because God made man and woman to correspond to each other, to complement one another physically, emotionally, and socially.

A second truth is that marriage involves a covenant between a man and a woman. They “leave” other relationships; they “hold fast” to each other, and they consequently “become one flesh.” The commitment is to be exclusive and permanent. The relationship is to be characterized by honor, trust, and loyalty. The Lord explained, “What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate.” (Matthew 19:5,6)

The third principle is that marriage is to be guided by the commandment of the Lord. Holding marriage in honor involves allowing God to define what loving behavior is and respecting His right to hold any who defile it accountable. Hebrews 13:4 says, “Marriage is to be held in honor among all, and the marriage bed is to be undefiled; for fornicators and adulterers God will judge.” Marriage is a relationship of responsibility.

It is important that we teach our young people the importance of the permanence of marriage. It is a shame on our nation that half of all marriages end in divorce. It has become too commonplace and the world has become complacent to the point of making light of what God expects of marriage.

This cannot be so in the church! Our children must see marriage as God intended it to be. Vows taken in marriage are to be made to one another and to God. It is a three-way relationship for the Christian - Husband/Wife/God - with God having preeminence in all things.

Solomon said long ago, “He who finds a wife finds a good thing and obtains favor from the LORD.” (Proverbs 18:22)

See you when the saints meet, Lord willing.

Love, Tony